Never Leave your Hat on the Bed: I've heard this before and have never been sure where it came from so I'm going to make something up (artistic license). The guy who coined this phrase was caught having an affair with his bosses wife. In turn, the boss fired him, and blacklisted him so no one would hire him, not even Speedway. Unfortunately, a a parting gift, his mistress gave him a sexually transmitted disease which he generously shared with his long suffering wife. On her first outbreak, the wife realized it could only have come from a cheating husband. So she bought a gun and shot him dead. All this because the dumb ass left his hat on the bed. Now that's some bad luck.
Wishing on a Falling Star: This is my favorite. Can't speak on whether it's true or not. The dome of gloom covering Cincinnati smothers them. Regardless, always know your wish ahead of time just in case.
Knocking on Wood: This is to ward off the voodoo-whammy-mojo you just placed on yourself for speaking of the future. In case there is no wood to knock on, here is a tip from my "Yiddish" dictionary. Look over your right shoulder and say "poo-poo-poo". It's the very same effect.
Wishing on the First Star you See Tonight: There is far too much opportunity here, so it can't possibly work. Having said that, I do it every night just in case. Sometimes, I think I wish on airplanes and radio towers...I'm never quite sure.
Letting a Bird Get in Your House: Have you ever seen what happens when a wild bird gets in your house? Everybody, including the bird, completely freaks out, all of you running into walls and screaming like a bunch of zombies. Bad luck for all parties involved. Even worse, are raven and crows. If a bird that big and that black stalks you, you're fucked no matter what you do. Don't invite them in to your house no matter what they tell you.
Step on a Crack; Break your Mothers Back: The thought of taking care of my mother while she's in traction has always been too much for me. While I step over anything that can even be construed as a crack in the sidewalk, I have a good friend that steps on every crack possible. Someday we'll both walk down the street together and start a new dance fad.
Find a Penny, Pick it Up: There are issue's with this one. Is it only good luck if it's laying heads up? Or down? My solution; always leave the penny where you found it for someone who needs the penny, and the luck, more then you do.
Dead Human Bodies Floating in the River: If you see a human body floating with the current, you should immediately remove an article of your clothing and throw it in the river. Wow, tough town. I'm not sure which culture this comes from, but I'm betting it's not the middle east. Not many riverside's to walk along in the desert.
Never Open an Umbrella Indoors: First of all, you're opening something that's meant for rain when it's not raining. That means you're just opening it to be belligerent, and if there's one thing the universe hates, it's belligerence. Do you want to be like Schlep-rock from the Flintstones for the rest of your life and have a gray cloud follow you everywhere you go? Secondly, umbrella's are so big and unruly, you're bound to break something. Probably a mirror, and that's even worse luck.
Touching the Car Ceiling when Passing Under a Train Trestle: In high school, while riding around with my fresh- off -the- temps 16 year old driving friends, I learned that this gesture would ensure that everyone in the car would always be friends. Too bad I can't remember who the hell they were.
Crossing Shadows: If someones shadow crosses yours, and you don't make sure your shadow crosses theirs back, it's bad luck. Must be hell on the playground. Way too exhausting for me, I'll take the bad luck.
Repeatedly Making Sure the Front Door is Locked: Any re-checking over five times means you're obsessive compulsive. Anything under five is only superstition. My benchmark? I only check three times.
Seeing "Little People" on the Day of the Show: Some superstitions come from experience as does this one. If you see any "little people" before your performance, it will ruin your show. Hey, before you judge, you try having a heckling dwarf stalk your band all the way through Texas. You'd be superstitious too.
Three on a Match: This one comes straight from the war zone. When in combat, never leave a match lit long enough to light three cigarettes because one of you, if not all of you, will be visible to the sniper that is going to shoot you. In peace time, it's still bad luck, because your ass is too poor to buy a disposable lighter. Although, if you can keep a match lit long enough to light three cigarette's, you are a certified smoking master.
Eating Black-Eyed Pea's and Hog Jowls on New Years Eve: While I've been aware of this superstition for many years, I've never actually ate it. That may explain the last twenty years. As long as I don't have to pick the meat off the hog's actual face, I think I'm desperate enough.
Driving the Same Route to a Sports Venue when on a Winning Streak: This is a sportsters superstition. Since I've never been on, rooted for or voted for a winning team in my life, I've only heard tell of it. Should I ever be on a winning streak, I will not only drive the same route, I will not shave or change my shirt. Nothing different there.
A Broken Mirror Means Seven Years of Bad Luck: The worst, most long-lasting of all. No words can describe how much you never want to do this. If it does happen....never mind, just don't do it. That is all I'm going to say about this except for "poo-poo-poo" over my right shoulder.
If One Person Bumps into a Pole while Walking in a Group: It is bad luck when this happens, especially to those whom walked around the pole instead of into it. The only remedy is for everyone, and it has to be everyone, to take a step back, and bump into the pole.
Never Walk Under a Ladder: Walking under ladders is so dangerous, they had to turn it into an evil superstition thing to make people stop doing it. Walking up or down a ladder ain't so safe either, but someone has to do it.
Going Through a Yellow Light: "Kiss my hand and touch the roof = 2 hours of good luck." Somewhat like touching the roof when the car goes under a train trestle, only with kisses and good luck. Only two hours of good luck stresses me out a little bit, so I plan ahead for this one.
Throwing Spilt Salt: I always throw spilt salt over my right shoulder. For some reason, it always seems to annoy the people seated behind me. Surely they've spilt salt before?
Black Cats Crossing your Path: Totally a myth made up by some racist-cat-hating mother fucker. All cats are good luck at all times.
